Monday, February 26, 2018

Weeks 85 and 86: bits and tatters of the past two weeks


Our p-day was pushed to today (February 22) so we could attend the temple. I have a feeling most of my journal entries are only going to be bits and tatters of what they should be, so I’ll try to get the events down for them but reflect more here.

It’s been a fluid few weeks. We are in the 5th of six weeks of this transfer. The first three seemed to go by really strongly as we were always busy contacting or calling or meeting or teaching or planning. I was working non-stop. It wasn’t so much exhausting for me in any particular aspect as it was a steady push distributed on every point: I was in a comfortable balance in every area (physical, mental, spiritual) but still giving my full effort. It’s like pushing with two hands or even with a shoulder versus trying to push with one finger.

The forth week showed we needed to address some things: WMLs and finding. We were knocking on the same few doors and texting the same people. By getting WMLs to meet regularly, we could have a steady flow of checking in –> knowing what we need to do, repeated. So it was somewhat herder, but mostly it just was less productive. It was evident to us.

We’ve got those meetings set up and I can already see the beginnings of it. One WML asked us to visit a few less active members, others have specific things to take to their ward council meetings on Sunday; it’s looking good. We set up the meetings with them so every meeting is in the week leading up to their ward councils.


Here are some notes from week 85 (February 12th-18th)

I had to sort out my prescription on Monday, as I was out; thankfully, everything came together. I thought it was squared away a few weeks ago, but my insurance company doesn’t cover the mission doctor’s prescriptions when I fill them in Utah.

We had a pretty fun activity based on whatever projectiles people had. I had a whole list of things we hadn’t done and we emailed from 4:45-6:00 at the apartment, but hey: I polished my shoes.

In the evening, we texted and called people until about 7:00. The second house we then visited, given to us by a WML, had a different family that we were expecting. The oldest son talked a lot with us. At one point, I realized his striking resemblance to Spencer. He did a lot of dangerous stuff as a young kid, got in with the wrong crowd, dropped out of high school, was in and out with the law, etc. He rediscovered what Jesus Christ could do in his life and is trying to turn things around right now. It’s s a little like Spencer if he turned back to the church; it was weird, but cool at the same time.

I got a package from my parents for Valentine’s Day. It had some snacks in it. I loved how my dad sent a box of chocolate toast sprinkles, which is the closest thing I have from my Dutch heritage. They’re good.

We got up at 5:15 am and biked at 5:45 am on Tuesday morning to teach a 6 am seminary class. Our whole zone wants involved. Well, our whole zone will be involved; we return for at 1:55 class as well. It was good; I’ve found honest answers help a lot with youth.

We went through a morning schedule plus texting people and reporting things before returning to the seminary at 1:00. By the way, I like cooking, but I love cooking with a nice kitchen and a dishwasher.

The 5th WML in Union Park set up a “ministering night” with the whole ward; 27 people split up to visit various ward members. It was a strong kickoff. In our visit, the grandmother had a lot of old church books. One of her daughters knew the author of a book on the origins of our current hymns.

Wednesday was hard because it felt like both of us could not put thought to action.
I guess the way to look at today is that it was a harder day, not from the challenges in it (it wasn’t that sort of challenging) but form how I wasn’t set out to do my best. But I didn’t give up on the day, and still tried. That’s going to have to be nice enough, I guess. We managed to teach a few new people this week; Adan, a grandchild split between his grandparents and mother, and Shayna, a single mom looking for help in a though time of her life.

Weekly planning was hard, as I felt like I didn’t know how best to find (again; I’ve gone through this before). We’re trying to hold well to our morning schedule

Sunday was the Midvale East stake conference. It focused on temple worship and family history work. We also set goals for March.

Leaving the church for dinner, we were delayed by a young woman with a lot of questions about some deeper doctrine (e.g., like if Adam had to be married to help in making the Earth). Then, we had a long dinner with one of our investigators because the conversation ran off into a political discussion without a space for us to speak up. We feel we can’t work with him in a productive way but can’t even explain that to him – he talks too much.


Week 86:

It snowed beginning Monday, February 19th. I guess that’s the end of the 60˚ highs that we were having until spring. We aren’t biking because of all the ice. We went on exchanges with Elder Beaman and Elder Haight. I went with Elder Haight in our area; we had some long, snowy walks. Elder Beaman and Elder Haight are from the Woodbridge stake in Virginia. They have a lot of good chemistry, as do Elder Hardt and I.

Tuesday (Feb. 20) was our zone conference. It was on following Christ’s example and our purpose. During the second part of the conference, President Hillier felt like we hadn’t prepared for it by doing the reading posted on Facebook a few weeks prior and so couldn’t get in to as deep a spiritual experience as he hoped for us to have. It hit me hard: I was asked to give a training on knowledge and only heard about the reading the Friday before, so I had one personal study – one hour – to do both. I made only an outline for the talk based on the reading, as I thought the discussion was going to be different than it was.

Our mission’s boundary will be changing in July, and we will be gaining some of the missionaries in the Salt Lake City Utah North mission. This will happen right as I go home. Our mission is starting adapt to some of the rules that the North mission has. One of them is changes in our emailing and preparation day standards. The biggest things are no chatting on email (emailing back and forth with people). Another is encouraging us to get out into the community and doing different things, like seeing the local attractions.

We had an unexpected lesson with one group we have tried to track down after a different lesson fell through. The bishop and stake president were going to visit ten minutes after we did, so when the sister opened the door she was surprised to find us there instead of them. We stayed and taught them all.

On Wednesday (Feb. 21), Elder Hardt woke up feeling sick. I saw him taper off yesterday afternoon/evening. He slept most of the morning and I was right there with him; I wasn’t sick, but I was tired enough to want to rest more than do anything else, as my purpose couldn’t really drive me. I had just told some other elders yesterday at zone conference that having a few days to rest when your companion is sick doesn’t fix feeling tired a week later, but I guess it still does something.

We went out at five and beyond. Our dinners haven’t been working out – the WML told us this is a blue-collared ward and getting appointments at 5:00 is hard. However, we had many things scheduled at 6:00 this week and were unable to swing it. This is the same WML who didn’t like something with a meeting being a waste of time or something… anyhow, the Ferguson’s (one set of the senior couples in the area we cover) had us over before going to a coordination meeting with the other of their two WMLs that we work with (we cover half their stake).

We had a Facebook chat with Adan, a new-ish investigator, as the in-person lesson with him fell through. We re-committed him and his grandmother to read the Book of Mormon and pray daily before our next lesson in eight days.

Today (Feb. 22) was supposed to be our temple trip, but Elder Hardt was sick. We didn’t go. I wasn’t able to fall asleep until sometime around 2:00 AM, so it was probably for the best that I didn’t run on 3-4 hours of sleep. It wasn’t because I was thinking about colleges; it was because I slept in on our p-day. We got to make slings with one member in our area and practice using them instead; I can see how David killed Goliath now.


I’ve found I don’t like contention. Before my mission (and still now), I liked to argue and pick apart the other’s side point of view -- not disabling them, but figuring out how they see things by asking lots of questions. I wasn’t really arguing, at least for me. I could still see myself going and doing debate club in college or something, but I’ve found I also don’t like when two sides do not understand each other and don’t particularly care to.

I also have a higher degree of empathy, but I don’t want to talk about that, at least right now.

Really, I want to go and do missionary work. I am uncomfortable with disruptions to doing missionary work, which explains many things. But it’s a little more complex, which is why I don’t always talk to everyone and moreover why I don’t always emotionally feel like that. But
looking at my values, I can see that missionary work itself is pretty important.


I have to choose my college – Carnegie Mellon or BYU – by April 1st. Tomorrow is the last temple trip between then and now. We may not get to go to the temple if Elder Hardt is unwell. I’ve only started to consider the pros and cons to each this week, so it wasn’t going to be a “please give me an answer” deal.

With my scholarships making the net cost of each almost equal, here are my current thoughts:
  • BYU: Proximity to family, religious study, religious environment, large student body, and a larger dating pool
  • Carnegie Mellon: Academic excellence, once-in-a-lifetime low cost, name recognition, small classes, and incredible career/employment opportunities
  • Standards: Carnegie Mellon isn’t a church school, but it’s not party school either.
It’s not even my heart versus my head.

So while my college choice is not really worrying me, it’s on my mind and I know I have to choose. Things don’t really worry me anymore (besides when I’m in the moment, tired, or hungry). Usually, I’m generally unaffected. I think it’s a sense of how everything will more or less be okay. It’s partially from my testimony, but elsewise I think it’s in just the way I am and faith in how things turn out. A lot of lows in my mission have taught me that things will work out even when I feel like it’s the end of the world. Another part is not having so many absolutes (it’s not a good vs evil choice) and being okay with what results may come.

But still, I’ll have to choose.



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